Beat-up beatnik

The Chinese word for "crisis" translates to "opportunity".

Insomnia leaves me with enough energy to last through morning,

but by the afternoon I am reduced to lying down and not-napping.

It's good for thinking semi-delirious thoughts.

I think it was Patti Smith who said she spent much of her youth sick in bed,

but was comforted by a romantic notion of victorian bedridden children.

My brain has a hard time letting go of being awake.

Being tired is one thing, being asleep is another.

Falling asleep is a third thing and the hardest for me.

I even take medication to help with this.

Not sleeping pills, but an antidepressant whose unintended side-effect is drowsiness.

Not sleeping makes me try really hard to sleep,

but sleeping isn't really about how hard you try.

I used to get frustrated with this, but not anymore.

So many other things in my life are going my way.

I feel up for this. There is a lesson here, too.